‘If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs…’

by James D. Irwin

On this day…

1998— General Pinochet is arrested, generally penalised for numerous human rights violations.

1993— anti-Nazi riots break out in Welling, Kent, almost fifty years too late.

1984— The Bill airs on British television for the first time.

1978— John Paul II becomes Pope, widely dismissed as another unnecessary Holywood  sequel.

1973— Henry Kissinger and Le Duc Tho awarded the Nobel Prize, America never again involve themselves in an unpopular war.

1968— US sprinters Tommie Smith and John Carlos perform a controversial Black Power salute on the podium at the Mexico City Olympics.

1964— The People’s Republic of China detonates its first nuclear bomb, fears of a nuclear holocaust take one step forward.

1962— Cuban Missile crisis begins, fears of a nuclear holocaust take one step forward.

1946— Execution of several high ranking Nazi officials at Nuremberg Trials.

1944— Wally Walrus makes his first TV appearance.

1923— The Walt Disney Company is founded by Walt Disney and, to a lesser extent, his brother Roy.

1793— Marie Antoinette is guillotined, her head rolls, revolutionaries eat cake.

1384— Jadwiga becomes King of Poland, despite being a woman; later canonized as St. Hedwig, patron saint of queens, much to the chagrin of Julian Clary.

Sincere birthday wishes to:

1535— Niwa Nagahide, Japanese warlord

1758— Noah Webster, one half of successful US Dictionary team Merriam-Webster

1854— Oscar Wilde, I have nothing to declare but his date of birth.

1900— Goose Goslin, baseball player/deceased naval aviator.

1922— Max Bygraves, the thinking man’s Bruce Forsythe

1925— Angela Lansbury, solver of over 250 television murders, Magnum PI guest star, original GILF.

1958— Tim Robbins, Shawshank prison escapee.

1959— Gary Kemp, the more talented and less successful brother of Martin.

1967— Davina McCall, talentless TV person made famous by interviewing talentless TV people.

1973— David Unsworth, dependable, no-nonsense central defender for Everton 1991-97, 1998-04.

1975— Jacques Kallis, South African cricket captain, all-rounder in ability and physique.

1983— Loreen, Swedish pop-star and current Eurovision champion.

1984— Melissa Lauren, French actress pornagraphique.

1991— Jedward, spawned by Shredder in a diabolical scheme to defeat the Turtles.

Merciful God not pictured.

And we fondly remember:

1591— Pope Gregory XIV, cruelly overshadowed by his calendar-creating namesake.

1755— Saint Gerald Majella, saint of unborn children, the falsely accused, mothers, expectant mothers, good confessions, lay brothers, and Muro Lucano in Italy. Any additional intercession of your choice for just £2.99!

1956— Jules Rimet, founding President of FIFA.

2007— Deborah Kerr, star of From Here to Eternity and recipient of one of the most controversial kissing scenes in film history.

2007— Barbara West, second-to-last survivor of the Titanic.

Not pictured: three hours of overrated melodrama, Jack.

Finally, please join everyone at Splendid Fred in celebrating International World Food Day and Bulgarian Air Force Day with a nice big bowl of Gyuvech!